Monday, March 29, 2010

My adventure of the last year...

So... Here I am today. Alive and well. The last 5 months have been hectic and almost unbearable. But here I am. I made it.
I started doing home schooling a little more than a year ago. My dad teaches Tae Kwon Do and one of his younger female students needed a place to live because her roommates were kicking her out. So my dad offered her a place to live under the circumstances that she be my home school teacher. She was amazing and I couldn't believe how cool she was. I thought it was great to share a room with her and get to learn from her. Go on field trips with her for school and all sorts of cool things. But under all that excitement I had a lingering feeling that something would go wrong and I wouldn't graduate through home schooling. So instead of listening to my gut feeling, I went with the idea of home schooling. If I would have known that it would end this way, I would have ran the other way at the very beginning.
The first few months of schooling seemed pretty easy. It was mostly just catch up and review. Until it got into the harder stuff that for some reason, my teacher didn't know how to teach me. So when there were subjects that she didn't know how to teach, she made me watch youtube videos to learn how to do it. That didn't bother me so much at first. But then she started leaving me at home by myself every single day to go to the beach or hang out with friends and would chew me out if I didn't get all of my homework done. The first few months of school were just a little weird. But then when it came to me wanting to get out with friends, she had issues with that and always came up with something for me to do instead of going out with friends. Even on weekends. And since my dad wasn't ever really home, I just listened to her because deep down, I really was somewhat frightened of her although I wasn't sure why, until about 5 months ago. She started getting really stressed because she had started going to Grad School online and had a lot of drama in her own life. She would take all of her frustrations out on me and go ballistic. Not just yelling, but screaming, and hitting me. I tried to make her stop. The first few times she did it, I forgave her right after and just dismissed it and thought that it was just a slip up, I thought that it just was a small thing, I thought it wouldn't happen again. But it slowly became worse and it was something that happened a few times a week. Then it became even more frequent and was happening every day. It got so bad that she actually broke my nose while we were wrestling on the floor. I was trying to get out of her grasp and she had me pinned on the floor. Then she slammed my face into the floor. She made me tell my dad and family that I fell face first on the carpet and broke my nose. Then a month down the line, we were wrestling again and she punched me in the face and broke my nose again. I couldn't even tell anyone about that one. And thankfully it wasn't noticeable. I don't know why I put up with it for so long. Like I've never seen someone go crazy like that on a person before. Let alone go crazy on me. Usually I stand up for myself. But I just didn't. For so long she controlled everything I did. All the way down to how long I could go camping with my dad for. Like I wanted to stay two nights at the lake with my dad and I could only stay one night because she wanted me to do school the next day. And then she left me to go with friends the next day. She would ask me to do favors for her like pack her gym bag for Tae Kwon Do. And I did that a couple times for her. I forgot her leggings one time and she freaked out big time on me. Made me cry just because I forgot her leggings.